5th July 2018

Is this A Tap on Your Shoulder?

It has happened again. An innocent conversation with a near neighbour told a story of another business owner who has had a meltdown brought on by the stresses of running a business.

I know the pattern. I remember the same thing myself. I feel the same pain. Working every hour to build a business. Doing too much stuff myself because I didn’t trust anyone else to do it well enough. Being buzzed up about living on the edge but becoming more and more tired and more and more error prone until something, some little thing, some inconsequential tiny little thing sparks an eruption that is just out of all proportion. We call these meltdowns. We call these flare ups. Whatever we call them they are also taps on the shoulder.

If we continue to ignore the taps on the shoulder and continue to head off track sooner or later the taps will become a 4 x 2 across the back of the head and if we continue to drift off track we will eventually be hit by a massive truck. I will bet that if you have ever been hit by a metaphorical truck in your life you will be able to remember the 4 x 2s that preceded it and you can probably remember the taps on the shoulder which preceded them. I know I can.

Life and especially business has a habit of continually teaching us our lessons until eventually we are forced to learn. Of course, if we were really sensible we would let the taps on the shoulder teach us rather than wait for the massive truck to do the job. Taps on the shoulder are part of a feedback mechanism which can literally save our lives. Massive trucks are part of the same feedback mechanism and they can cost us our lives.

Irrational behaviour, depression, fatigue and sudden aggressive outbursts may be signs that we need some help. They may be taps, or they may already be 4 x 2s. If you google ‘Mental Health Continuum’ you will see a scale of mental health from Healthy to Injured that makes for interesting reading.

The real help isn’t necessarily the help to cope, or the help to understand although they may have a place. The very best help might well be the help to remove the causes of our depression, fatigue and anger and that is available to each one of us once we learn what we need to learn.

Don’t wait, as I did, to meet that truck. You already have access to the solutions you need and, above all, recognise those taps on the shoulder as your very own personal early warning system and be prepared to do something different so you don’t have to pay the consequences.

Book a free coaching consultation with Ian Kinnery today!